Where is your limit?

Arrrgghhh! You know that feeling of frustration? That feeling of 'no, not again'. Or the irritation about a situation you find yourself in once again. I have trouble setting boundaries. I know that about myself. I've been working for years to not let my boundaries be crossed anymore, so that I can stand up for myself and no longer let myself be dragged into the energy of others.

“Inge, can you do this, Inge can you do that? I know you said no, but my case is special. Why can't you do it for a while?" Anyone who also has trouble setting boundaries will no doubt be familiar with this. You set your boundaries, but somehow not clear enough or in a way that makes it clear to others that they shouldn't cross this line anyway.

The key is with me. Because why do I let myself be influenced so much by those people? Is it maybe that I don't dare to stand up for myself? Could it be that I feel my needs are being pushed aside by people who have no trouble standing up for what they need? And don't dare to take up the space that they so easily claim for themselves? Deep inside of me is still the lonely little girl who so desperately wants to be part of the group, just wants to belong. The little girl who thinks that if only she's nice enough, if only she manages to please others, she'll be accepted.

What do the Guides say?

“Dear soul, the key is within you. You can start by accepting yourself. You don't have to be like others. You are different. You are perfect in your own way. By wanting to conform to what you think others want of you, you let yourself down. You drift a little further away from yourself. A little further from the unconditional love that you are and that is also there for you. Even if you don't believe it.

Dear soul, you are worth it. The approval of others does not change that. Whether what you do is appreciated by many, or by no one at all, it doesn't change the value of you at all. You are incredibly valuable. Start by valuing yourself and seeing and feeling your own worth. With that comes the love to yourself and the power to believe in yourself. In this way you can let go of the opinions and desires of others in order to clearly know what is good for you and what is not.

The next step is to actually start living it. Apply it in your life. That way you can set boundaries in a healthy way and keep people to them. Whether they like it or not. That doesn't matter anymore. Because you love yourself. You are lovable. And you don't need anyone's confirmation for that.”